Four Lincoln County educators tackled the issue of bullying at the fourth annual Emil Landau Human and Civil Rights Forum Nov. 3 at Skidompha Library.
The panel discussed the evolution of bullying in the digital age, as well as strategies to address bullying, to a sizable crowd in the library’s Porter Hall.
Lincoln Academy social worker Rachel Bennett, Great Salt Bay Community School (GSB) social worker Rebecca Cannon, Lincoln Academy Associate Head of School Andrew Mullin and GSB Assistant Principal Kim Schaff made up the panel.
The problem of bullying is more serious than the occasional fat lip, the educators said. “The neuroscience is there to say it shuts down [students’] brain[s],” Schaff said.
“Their brain is not available because they’re busy worrying about their safety,” Cannon said.
Schaff related an anecdote about a student who “had been made fun of for years because of her body size.”
The constant teasing “made her feel so uncomfortable that she just did not want to come to school to face that,” Schaff said.
The student’s academic performance suffered, leading to a special education evaluation. The evaluation didn’t turn up a learning disability, however. Finally, the student’s mother told the administration about the bullying.
“We were able to address the situation with [her] peers,” Schaff said, and Schaff sat down with the student to discuss the situation.
“Her attendance changed,” Schaff said.
The anecdote also illustrates the importance of identifying and reporting bullying. The educators all point to “warning signs” of bullying.
A victim of bullying might express a desire to change their mode of transportation, Cannon, the GSB social worker, said. If the bullying happens on the bus, for example, the student might ask for a ride or permission to walk to school.
Other warning signs include academic drop-off, distraction, intro- or extroversion, nightmares and other disruption of sleep patterns, truancy and changes in social behavior, such as hanging out with a different peer group or solely with adults.
The signs are similar in high school, where the insecurities of adolescence create “a very ripe environment” for bullying, Bennett said.
Victims sometimes respond by becoming “more violent, more hostile, or take on bullying behavior themselves,” Bennett said.
The damage extends beyond the direct victims, as students not yet the target of bullying nonetheless “live in fear” of becoming a target, Schaff said.
Classmates aren’t the only bullies, Mullin said. A student might be the victim of bullying or other abuse from a parent, stepparent or sibling.
The educators all stressed the role – what Bennett called the “responsibility” – of the community to recognize symptoms and report bullying.
A community member who lives adjacent to a neighborhood bus stop reported bullying there, Schaff said.
“I would have had no knowledge” of the bullying otherwise, Schaff said, but, thanks to the community member, she was able to address the issue.
The panel also discussed the potential root causes of bullying, including the impact of technology.
Cannon cited a study that says children spend an average of 10 hours a day in front of a screen, whether a computer, television or other device.
The increase in screen time supplants interaction with people and, consequently, time spent learning important relationship skills, Cannon said.
Cannon also sees a causal relationship between violent video games and a “lack of empathy” in children, she said.
Schaff points to television programming as another contributor to bullying. Children see adults “being mean to each other” and “being very disrespectful to children… in the name of entertainment,” Schaff said.
The children’s behavior reflects this “poor modeling,” Schaff said.
Technology serves not only as a cause of bullying, but also as a means. The issue has gained national media attention after a series of suicides directly tied to so-called cyberbullying.
“We’re now dealing with a lot of electronic bullying,” Mullin said.
Communications via social networking websites, text messages or other modern methods often spark confrontations at school, Mullin said.
The communication might take place after school, over the weekend, or even at school. Lincoln Academy blocks “certain websites,” Mullin said, but students “have figured out ways to get around those filters.”
The verbal abuse handed out online often exceeds anything a student might say in person. “We all know how courageous we become when we’re in front of a computer screen and the person we’re attacking or degrading can’t do anything to us physically,” Mullin said.
The availability of cell phones and social networking in the home robs bullying victims of a safe haven. Kids “can’t escape” anymore, Cannon said. “Limiting that media is vital.”
The panel also talked about prevention of and response to bullying, with all four educators agreeing on the importance of establishing trust with students.
Lincoln Academy has an advisor/advisee system that provides students with “a supportive adult” outside the classroom, Mullin said.
“Sometimes kids are very ashamed, they’re embarrassed” by being a victim of bullying, Cannon said. “They don’t know how you’re going to react if you don’t have a rapport set up with them that says, ‘Hey, I’m on your side.'”
“The most important thing is that they don’t feel alone,” she said.
The schools, in addition to promoting a supportive atmosphere for victims, follow up on all reports of bullying.
Schaff explained GSB’s disciplinary process during a question and answer session. The school first warns the bully and “makes them aware of the fact that their actions are considered bullying,” she said.
If the bullying continues, the student must fill out a Notice of Behavior Action process sheet, known as a NOBA. If the student fails to fill out the form in a thoughtful way, they meet with Schaff or Cannon for a follow-up conversation.
If the student doesn’t correct his or her behavior, the school might meet with the parents and, in extreme cases, refer the matter to the Damariscotta Police Dept. The police, in turn, sometimes refer cases to the Attorney General if they determine harassment or a civil rights violation has taken place.
“We don’t want to get to that point,” Schaff said.
GSB also logs all discipline infractions and has distributed an anonymous survey to students in grades 5-8 to ask questions about bullying.
Bennett encouraged parents of victims – even victims who specifically ask their parents not to do anything – to contact the school.
“I think harassment is a safety issue,” Bennett said. If the parents bring the issue to the school, “We can brainstorm together” and determine how best to handle the situation, she said.
The panel wrapped up the forum on a hopeful note.
“I don’t think anyone is fundamentally rotten,” Mullin said. “You can work with anyone… [We don’t] sit down with someone one time and say ‘Geez, we tried. Didn’t work.'”
The Emil Landau Human and Civil Rights Forum series was established in 2008 to honor the memory of the late Damariscotta resident and Holocaust survivor Emil Landau. Previous forums have focused on the right to food and the right to housing.
