When I was a child, it was easy to believe my mother knew everything. She always knew the right thing to say or do. I still remember the shock I felt when she had to admit she couldn’t just magically repair a plastic toy I had broken. I was convinced she would just do her “mom” thing and everything would be fine.
She usually could but, as she ruefully told me then and not for the last time, she couldn’t work miracles.
It wasn’t until years later, after I became parent myself, that I figured out how much both of my parents were making it up as they went along. By then I had realized how fortunate I was to have the childhood they gave me. My mother in particular made it a point to make our house a home. We never had much, but we never wanted for much either.
Out in the real world, not every kid is so blessed. For many people, the classic nuclear family model I was fortunate enough to grow up with was more myth than material.
As society has changed over the course of my lifetime, family models have changed too. These days families can have any variety of parent(s) and still produce healthy, happy children who grow up to become well-adjusted, perfectly functional adults.
I have come to believe the best thing a parent can do is give their children unconditional love and support. Give them a solid base to stand on, encouragement to do well, consequences when they need it, and a net to catch them when they fall. With love and luck, all that love will come back to you.
That’s what happened in my case anyway. My mother and I had the standard issue growing pains over the years of course, but she was always my champion and I was always her baby boy. She has been gone nigh on 15 years now and I miss her every single day.
All this is to say this weekend is good reminder to take time out for the ones we love while they are still here to love.
On Mother’s Day – or any other day – call your mother. Call the person that mothered you. Call somebody else’s mother who means something to you. You’ll never regret making someone’s day.
Life comes at us fast, we learn, and while you can almost always make amends, nobody has yet figured out how to make more time. Not even my mother could do that, and I still like to believe she could do miracles.
