To the Editor:
I would like to call your attention to the serious and sometimes deadly issue of domestic violence in our community. We each need to accept a greater degree of personal responsibility to protect our loved ones, friends, neighbors and co-workers from the deleterious effects of domestic violence.
Reverend Peter Panagore once said “silence is the best friend of domestic violence” and this is so true.
We need to become the voice for victims who are isolated and controlled by the actions of their batterers. We need to break that silence and help victims come out of the darkness to a place where they can once again be safe. We need to hold offenders accountable for their actions and protect the lives of domestic violence victims and their children.
The words “domestic violence” often conjures up images of women who are beaten, bloody, hurt and left for dead. More realistically, domestic violence is not an event but rather a pattern of coercive behavior that is used by a person against another to gain power and control over the other person in that relationship.
The behavior can include any of the following: physical violence, emotional and psychological intimidation, verbal abuse and threats, unexplained silence, sexual abuse, emotional and psychological intimidation, stalking, isolation from family and friends, economic control, emotional and physical harm to children, monitoring your computer or cell phone, destruction of personal property and animal cruelty.
Domestic violence affects thousands of Maine families and many people right here in our own community. The impact of abuse and violence extends beyond the home and spreads into our workplaces. It can include misuse of work time and equipment, such as excessive calling, texting, emails that are done in an effort to maintain the control over the victim while he/she is at work.
It can include random visits at work to check on the victim, as a subtle reminder from the perpetrator that they are still in control even when the victim is at work. I would challenge all workplaces in our community to think about your employees; find ways to keep victims safe at work and hold offenders accountable.
If you are a victim of domestic or sexual violence, or stalking and are in need of assistance and/or resources, go to your supervisor at work or someone at work you can trust to discuss the needs you have. If you are a perpetrator or batterer, and you have used any work time, or work equipment to commit your crimes, you must be held accountable by your employer.
This is as a very serious problem facing all Mainers, and I am calling on each and every one of you to step up and help your loved one, colleague, friend or neighbor who may be living with domestic violence. If you or someone you know is in an unsafe or potentially dangerous situation, please pick up the phone and call the Statewide Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-866-834-HELP(4357).
Also, New Hope for Women is the local domestic violence agency serving our area and you can speak to someone the 24 hours a day, 7 days a week at 1-800-522-3304.
Break the silence; give a voice to this ever increasing problem in our community.
